


Sobriety

by J_E_McCormick



Series: Say Nothing Of It [15]
Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, M/M, brief hints at past abuse, but if you read this series you know that already
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-04
Updated: 2013-07-04
Packaged: 2017-12-17 16:24:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 772
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/869565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/J_E_McCormick/pseuds/J_E_McCormick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Since Grantaire started sobering up, they’ve all noticed a lot of changes in him. Grantaire sober is worlds apart from Grantaire drunk. However, with Grantaire’s sobriety, there are just as many problems as improvements.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sobriety

Since Grantaire started sobering up, they’ve all noticed a lot of changes in him. Grantaire sober is worlds apart from Grantaire drunk. Without the drunken swagger, it is much easier to believe that he’d been a gymnast and a dancer as well as a boxer in his youth; he moves with far more grace and control, holds himself much prouder, and has even on one occasion swept Jehan into an absolutely beautiful tango – until Jehan had collapsed in laughter and Grantaire had scolded him playfully about losing step.

His eyes are clear and bright and although he is just as enthusiastic as usual – that being, not at all – and still makes as many cynical and sarcastic quips as ever before, he is also far more likely to get into actual discussions with well thought out points. If Grantaire was good at playing devil’s advocate while drunk, it’s nothing compared to now. The debates he and Enjolras get into are legendary, and hardly ever devolve into angry barbs that have nothing to do with politics.

However, with Grantaire’s sobriety, there are just as many problems as improvements.

They have one incident where Enjolras is giving an impassioned speech, and Grantaire is right up with the rest of them, debating and throwing arguments and flaws to him, and Enjolras makes one fatal gesture – Enjolras is very mobile and gestures a lot with his whole body, never entirely still when he’s speaking – of throwing his fist in the air and leaning forwards, just slightly. It’s something he’s done countless times before, but this time something seems to be different, and Grantaire leaps backwards out of his chair with an expression of pure terror.

Bahorel has pushed everyone out of the way before they even have time to think, and it takes him a moment to snap Grantaire out of an apparent trace; he’s shaking, and his eyes are focused on the middle distance, and he’s curled under one of the tables as if he’s trying to hide or protect himself. He flinches violently when Bahorel touches his shoulder, even though it’s a gentle touch, and then he falls against Bahorel’s chest and starts to cry. Bahorel pulls him out from under the table with soothing words – “It’s alright, I’ve got you, kid, you’re okay.” – and steers them home. Enjolras follows quickly after them, though not before looking to Bahorel for permission.

When they come into the next meeting, Grantaire is in the far corner, and Enjolras is constantly looking over to him, and they can see him concentrating very hard on not moving too much or too suddenly. They never get a full explanation of what had happened, just a sheepish apology from Grantaire and a warning from Bahorel to not raise their arms at him. They have suspicions after that, but none are confirmed for months.

He takes to sitting in the very furthest corner, something he hasn’t done since he was first brought along by Bahorel. He’s just as friendly as he’s always been, but they can see a flash of concern behind his eyes. He watches every move made like a hawk, and although the fact that he’s much more focused and aware of surroundings is better than him being insensate, he’s now hyper-vigilant. He startles easily, at loud noises and sudden movements, so they learn to be careful of that too.

Grantaire has ever darkening bags under his eyes, and chugs coffee at the same rate he used to drink alcohol. Enjolras also has dark smudges under his eyes a lot of the time, and although it’s not a new occurrence, it shows that he’s getting even less sleep than before. Although they never catch Grantaire asleep, they’ve found him with Enjolras dozing off on his shoulder before. He looks guilty but they never question why.

It’s obvious there’s something they’re not being told, but they never push it.

It’s not so much of a victory, nor does it bring them much joy; it’s obvious Grantaire is suffering a lot in sobriety. But they feel comforted that Grantaire’s health is not being destroyed by copious amounts of alcohol, and Enjolras doesn’t get angry or annoyed at Grantaire so much anymore. In fact, Enjolras is a lot more affectionate, not at all unhappy to have Grantaire tucked into his side or against his back, and those are the times when Grantaire looks his happiest, with his nose pressed against Enjolras’ neck or their fingers laced together, and those are the times the Amis know that in the long run, this is going to be the best decision for Grantaire to have made.

**Author's Note:**

> As a brief reference, Bahorel is Grantaire's 'safe place' - as long as Bahorel is there, he knows that no-one will be allowed to hurt him. He's always gone to Bahorel to hide out from his father, Bahorel has always defended him from bullies, so for Grantaire, with Bahorel is the safest place to be.
> 
> Idk that was a bit of a rant and it's only vaguely relevant buuut oh well shhhh


End file.
